Hello, it’s me!!

We’ve reached that time of the year … that warm, WARM time of the year. Outdoor time is reserved for 6:30am, #amirite?

A lot of the day is spent indoors. And while resting, I like to take advantage of the concept of leverage. Case in point:

Did you see what I did there? No? Let me show you.

If the back of the couch ever decided to do anything, my rear right leg is there to stop the madness. This is how I maintain leverage over my Dad in bed … in the middle of the night a right rear drumstick in Dad’s back is all it takes to prevent 250 or more pounds of thunder from crushing me. Whether it is Dad’s back or an inanimate object, I apply leverage in an effort to control the situation during these boiling-hot days of late June.

Hello, it’s me!

When it is 110 degrees out and you’re finding a shady spot to do your duties, it gets a bit lonely.

Making matters worse today is that Grandma and Grandpa took their fancy new-old car back to Wisconsin, leaving me with fewer people to protect.

But the real kick in the belly happened yesterday, when I had to leave California and say goodbye to my new girlfriend … Stella!

Obviously Stella loved me after I told her I worked really hard to shave off a few pounds. She admired my determination fostered by a lack of access to food.

We spent a whole day together while attending the High School Graduation Party of my dear friend Julia and buddy Luke. Stella and I were (to be brutally honest) inseparable.

We had real conversations:

Dash: Wanna play?

Stella: Wanna play?

Dash:  I’ll play!

Stella:  I’ll play!

Dash:  I’ll use my girthy frame to push you.

Stella:  I’ll use my stealthy maneuverability to constantly nudge my nose into your ear.

Dash:  You mean whisper sweet nothings into my ear?

Stella:  What?

Dash:  Too soon, #amirite?

Stella:  Wanna play?

Dash:  I’ll play!

Stella:  I’m exhausted.

Dash:  Let’s lie down for awhile.

Stella:  Ok.

Dash:  I’m bored.

Stella:  Me too.

Dash:  Wanna play?

Stella:  I’ll play!

Dash:  Good!

And so it went with my dear friend Stella!

Without Grandma and Grandpa and Julia and Luke and Stella to warm my heart, I was left to defend the homestead. And defend the homestead I did!