Happy Birthday To Me!!

Hello! It’s me, and I’m three!!


That was me on my first birthday – Mom and Dad conveniently evaded the day by fleeing to Europe and my sitters did this to me.

Needless to say, I told Dad he couldn’t take a picture of me on birthday number three, #amirite?

So Dad says fine, spend the day by yourself. He decided to take the RV to a “Touch a Truck” day.


Dad began by melting one hundred and fifty chocolate treats in that red bowl within 20 minutes of placing the bowl in the sun. Molten milk chocolate, pups.

Fortunately he had two more bags of unhealthy treats to pass on to the kids.

And the kids did show up … a half-hour early in fact.


Some of the kids looked really odd … like this one riding the right shoulder of the woman.


Four hours later and 700 – 1,000 visitors, Dad was done. Here’s the floor of the RV that greeted him after the masses departed.



There were comments. Here’s a sampling of the activity.


GUY: Is this your rig?

DAD: Yes.

GUY: Really?

DAD: Yes.

GUY: Why would you do this?

DAD: So the kids can have fun.

GUY: I don’t get it.


KID: Can I go in?

DAD: Yes.

MOM: No.

DAD: Huh?

MOM: His teacher sent him home from school for being bad yesterday and I couldn’t get a babysitter so today he can’t go in or climb on anything and one day he will learn there are consequences for his actions.

The kids sobs quietly and nods his head affirmatively.


Scene: A 12-ish year old boy is carrying his 4-ish year old sister like a baguette.

BOY: My sister tried to use your toilet.

SISTER (screaming): But I have to go.


BOY’S FATHER: Should I get an RV?

BOY: Yeah.

BOY’S FATHER: Then you could drive and I could drink in the back.

MOM stares at my Dad with an unparalleled look of mortification.


BOY’S FATHER: Timmy, you shouldn’t keep hitting this guy’s horn non-stop.

RV horn continues to beep.

BOY’S FATHER to my DAD: But you’ve got to admit it’s funny.


GUY: I’ll buy it.

DAD: It’s not for sale.

GUY: You’re not a dealer?

DAD: No.

GUY: Darn.





7 thoughts on “Happy Birthday To Me!!

  1. I’m confused…..what is a “touch a truck” day? And why are you handing out chocolates? Is this an annual event in your town? Looks like you got more than a “touch” on the floor of the RV.


  2. And the reason for a “Touch a Truck Day” is ????? You are luck that you didn’t go Dash. Didn’t look like fun for me. Hope there was a celebration when mom and dad got home. Hang in there good buddy. Anybody heard from Wendy? Is she gone forever?
    HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!!!! Auntie Janet


  3. Kev-you really are one of the nicest people I know…..but tell me, did the little girl use the toilet? I can only imagine the faces you were silently making in Tori’s direction. Too funny…Happy Birthday tomorrow. You and Dash share a birthday week, I would expect to see lots of birthday pictures of you both out frolicking around. Love ya


  4. Dear dash, Happy Birthday you handsome son of a gun you. My sneakkie treat: sprinkle almonds into glass pie pan;sprinkle chocolate chips over;nuke it quickly in microwave, spatula onto small plates and serve with forks to those with thumbs and, just the plate for those without, and the heck with your diet. X o x from the great northwest.

    On Sat, Oct 20, 2018, 8:49 PM Dash the Dachshund wrote:

    > Kevin posted: “Hello! It’s me, and I’m three!! That was me on my first > birthday – Mom and Dad conveniently evaded the day by fleeing to Europe and > my sitters did this to me. Needless to say, I told Dad he couldn’t take a > picture of me on birthday number three, #amir” >


  5. I am horrified, Dash. Good thing you don’t fully understand human conversation. Ugh. Ugh also to the bucket of melted chocolates. Or, maybe that’s a yuck. Anyway, You are good sports to participate in Touch a Truck day. You deserve your halos, and methinks they will shine for at least a couple of years.


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