Hello. It’s me!

I’m told that the sun is past peak now, so ima gonna soak up every single possible ray of light available to me … even if our summer turns out to be cool and clammy, as is now forecast. Or, I’ll soak up the rays until my skin is gently broasted by El Sol. Then, I retire to the comfy confines of our living room and await our next adventure.

Dad tells me that given our geographic proximity to The Border, we are blessed to celebrate the Independence of two nations.

“Whatevs pops”. As long as Dad cooks hot dogs on the grill and I get to sample a half-dozen morsels, I’ll go along with his Master plan. Peace, Canada!

According to my calculations, I’ve been alive for 0.3% of the history of this Great Country. This leaves me uniquely qualified to offer my opinions on this glorious Day. Here are a few random and utterly meaningless thoughts, shared in no particular order. Bask in my wisdom.

1. The Eagle may be the symbol of all that is great about our country, but the eagle that makes dinosaur-esque sounds outside my bedroom window at 4:45am needs to chill, dude.
2. The fact that Dad spilled an entire can of Diet Pepsi all over his pajamas and computer keyboard this morning has no bearing whatsoever on his ability to put kibble in the bowl each week. That being said, it does make one wonder how he gets through the day.
3. For some, sticks and stones may break their bones. But for me, sticks are meant to be carried down our driveway in my mouth and deposited next to our front door.
4. Tree sap on my neck, what the heck?

I’m dreaming of Making America Great Again … though from my point of view, it’s been pretty great so far. Though I do long for the mythical Wendy in my life …

Have a Happy July 4. Be safe!