Hello. It’s ME!!

A day of food started with a breakfast-sized helping of sunrise.

I know this to be true, because I had to potty at 5:25am, so this is the prize for the early bird.

Several hours later, we were touring once again. We saw downtown Bayfield.

Then Mom picked up another coveted stamp.

This was about the time of the day when the theme switched from nature to nourishment.

You probably don’t know about an Upper Peninsula tradition known as the “Pasty”. These hand-held treats, converted to unseemly “Hot Pockets” by “The Man” or “Calzones” by George Costanza, are filled with meat and spuds and are wrapped in a delicious pie crust that is to die for. Or so Mom and Dad told me.

In order to enjoy a pasty, we had to cross over into Michigan.

Then we drove two blocks to Joe’s Pasty Shop.

They were closed …

… but WAIT … Lady Proprietor #2 unlocked the door. Dad explained that we drove 2,200 miles to eat a pasty, and then Lady Proprietor #2 welcomed Dad in and pulled two hot traditional pasties out of the pile she was taking home.

I’ll say this much … Dad is not a fan of spuds, so I got my fair share of Idaho’s finest. Pretty tasty! Nom nom nom nom nom nom.

When we were done, we drove two blocks back into Wisconsin.

Down US-51 we traveled to the tourist trap known as Minocqua. Based on a recommendation from Grandpa, we drove back out of Minocqua and progressed seventeen miles to St. Germain … where we visited what is called a “Supper Club”.

What is a “Supper Club”, you ask?

Well, you won’t get breakfast at a Supper Club. Or brunch. Or lunch. You get to indulge in “Supper”. You won’t leave disappointed.

Let’s start with the basics. We ate at McGregor’s Blink Bonnie. When you walk up to the front door, you know immediately that you are in for the experience of a lifetime.

Here’s how the “scheme” works. You put your name in, much like you would at Olive Garden (copy cats), then you are required to sit down at the bar and enjoy beverages. In marketing, this is called the “cross-sell”, and based on what happened to Mom & Dad, the cross-sell worked.

You know, that camera angle makes Dad’s left hand look like massive, unusable appendage, don’t you think?

Mom ordered a Brandy Old Fashioned Sweet. We were told that they sell 300 variants of that drink per night … at just $5 a pop, you can see why (#math).

See the wine bottles behind the bar? They need a lot of those, too, when you consider what a $5 serving of wine looks like:

The decor in the bar is top-flight, no doubt about it.

Once you enjoyed the opportunity to consume a beverage, you are invited into the dining room. The place settings are right out of an episode of Downton Abbey.

You have plenty of choices … but you are encouraged to enjoy a Filet or a Ribeye. Guess who enjoyed the Ribeye?

Our server was stunned to learn that French Dressing is not a restaurant option for a typical Pacific Northwest starter-salad. Stunned. She repeatedly re-visited the table, inquiring about the mysteries of replacing French Dressing on a salad with various balsamics. Dad says the poor server was dumbfounded, flummoxed, maybe even dazed. At times, she appeared to be close to passing out. Ok, I made the passing-out part up. I wasn’t even there.

Dad let me sup on a half-dozen tiny cutlets of ribeye. I must say, I love every aspect of a supper club if it means I get to enjoy a half-dozen tiny cutlets of ribeye after every visit!

No drinks for me, however.

After dinner (you have to get there before 5:30pm, by the way, or it’s sheer chaos as the place really fills up), we drove to a hotel in Minocqua; I co-piloted the vehicle (visit the website if you cannot see the video).

We checked in to our hotel (#dogfriendly), and then Dad took me on a 45 minute walk through town. I decided to engage with a terrapin.

But the whole process of engaging with a terrapin is rather empty … I’m a fast paced boy (#dash) and she was, well, a terrapin, barely moving at all. In fact, it looked like she was laying eggs.

So we went back to the hotel and Dad pulled out a big ‘ole bag of chewies.

A day of food left me stuffed … I collapsed under the weight of my own inertia.

Wisconsin is a lot like an endless buffet of 3,500 calorie options. Anybody could enjoy a day of food. From what I saw today, some people (#dad) have enjoyed a lifetime of food. Is it any wonder I needed a 45 minute walk to burn off the calories?

Ready for this? Tomorrow, I may be introduced to my first-ever Thunderstorm. Not the puny 10,000 foot types that populate the Pacific Northwest a half-dozen times a year. Nope. We’re talking the 50,000 foot variety that may turn severe. Oooooooohhhhhhhh boy.